Positive Thinking

Secret of cultivating a positive attitude

2008-10-08T22:02:00.000-07:00

Have you ever wondered how some people become successful and they keep riding the stairs of success?
They use a technique called Autosuggestions. Autosuggestions (or Affirmations) are suggestions or thoughts we keep giving ourselves throughout the day.

These can be negative or positive.

Example of negative autosuggestions
I am tired.
I have a bad memory.
I cant remember names.
I am unlucky.
Why do bad things always happen to me ?

Example Of positive autosuggestions
I am happy.
Life is good !!
Good Things always happen to me.
I am so lucky !!
I am the best in whatever I do.

When we give ourselves an autosuggestion (either positive or negative), our subconscious mind starts believing it, and it makes our thought a reality. Now, you know this wonderful power, don’t you think you can use it your advantage by giving yourself positive autosuggestions ?

So, how do you do that ??? Follow P P 21 Success Rule

First P means : Present Tense
Your autosuggestions should be in present tense.

Example. If you want to be a good public speaker, then instead of saying – I will be a good speaker, say: I am a fantastic speaker and am improving day by day.

Second P means : Positive Phrasing
Do not phrase your autosuggestions in a negative way.

Example. If you want to be rich, then don’t say to yourself – I will not remain poor anymore.
Instead, say – I am becoming richer with each passing day. Or I am becoming better in my business with each passing day.

This small exercise will help you understand this more clearly.
Now, whatever I will say, try to imagine that.

Do not, Do not think about red colored monkeys.
Do not imagine red colored monkeys fighting with each other.
Do not imagine a red colored monkey hitting a blue colored monkey.

I bet you saw red colored monkeys, That’s the way our brain functions. So, always phrase your autosuggestions in a positive way.

21 means : If you give yourself positive autosuggestions repeatedly for 21 days, your subconscious mind will make it as true and you would be able to achieve all that you ever wanted to achieve in your life. The important aspect is - that you should tell yourself positive autosuggestions repeatedly. & you will start noticing the difference in your behavior within a week.

Now, it’s up to you to have faith in yourself and start believing positive.
Because
If you think, you can do it.

Even the Bible says:

If you have faith, everything shall be possible to you.

I am Attempting a Personal Goal of Reaching 1,000 Subscribers in 100 Days

2008-10-07T04:44:00.000-07:00

I am Attempting a Personal Goal of Reaching 1,000 Subscribers in 100 Days

Starting from 7th October onwards, I will be attempting a personal goal of hitting an amazing 1,000 subscribers in 100 days which means that I must hit this target by January 15, 2009. It is almost getting 10 subscribers every day. Quite challenging !!

I feel that goals are very important as they give us the energy and the power to guide us to the path of success. I feel that everything is possible for the person who is focused on his goal and works towards achieving it.

My current subscriber count is around 45 as of October 6, which means that I would need to have 955 readers subscribing to my blog in only 100 days to go.

In order for me to realize my goal, As a friend, I request you to help me out by Subscribing to my RSS Feed or FREE E-mail Subscription.

A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step !!

I hope you will help me out in taking these few important steps....

Thanks a lot and I hope I will be able to reach my goal !

1. Think about Goals for your life !!
2. The Phenomenal Power of Focus !!
3. Improve Your Life - Commitments !!
4. Kick Procrastination - Execute your To Do List

Risks

2008-10-05T04:40:00.000-07:00

To laugh is to risk appearing the fool.
To weep is to risk appearing sentimental.

To reach out for another is to risk http://www.blogger.com/posts.g?blogID=2863562872623524979involvement.
To expose feelings, is to risk exposing your true self.

To place your ideas, your dreams, before a crowd is
to risk their loss.

To love is to risk not being loved in return.
To live is to risk dying.

To hope is to risk despair.
To try is to risk failure.

But risks must be taken, because the greatest
hazard in life is to risk nothing.

The person who risks nothing, does nothing, has
nothing and is nothing.

They may avoid suffering and sorrow, but they
can not learn, feel, change, grow, love or live.

Chained by their attitudes, they are slaves.
They have forfeited their freedom.
Only a person who risks is free.

-Anonymous

1. Exclusive Interview: Stephen Covey
2. What is Fear ?? - False Evidence Appearing Real
3. Building beautiful relationships
4. 7 Powerful Tips to Get the Maximum Out of Any Situation
5. Improve Your Life - Commitments !!

A "Half Filled Glass" or A "Half Empty" One ??

2008-09-28T04:35:00.000-07:00

If there is a glass which is half filled with water, one person looks at it as "A half empty glass" while other looks at it as "Half full glass".

The people who look at the half filled glass enjoy life and feel cheerful. You can always see a cute smile on their face.
While those who look at the half vacant glass always keep cribbing about life. You must have observed people saying :

My life sucks
I am not happy with my life
Why do bad things always happen to me
Life is unfair to me

Or, you might find them giving excuses for one thing or another. These are the people who do not fix the problem but try to fix the blame on one thing or the other.

I do not have a good memory.
I am poor because I do not have a good education background.
I cant do it, I don't think I have enough courage for that.
I am not rich because of my destiny.

The point is, looking at the negative side of things don't lead them anywhere, In fact they lose opportunities by looking at the negative side.

Here is how one of my friend lost an opportunity because of her negative attitude :

Recently, I had attended a seminar on Public Speaking in Delhi in India. The speaker was Winner of 1990, Toastmasters World Champion in Public Speaking & Coach of 7 World Champions of Public Speaking.

The timings for the seminar were 7 P.M to 9 P.M. One of my friends was supposed to arrive at the seminar. Her plan was to first reach her home(from office) and then come to the seminar. But she reached her home from office at 7:30 P.m, The seminar hall was just 10 minutes drive from her home.

She thought - "Oh, its already 7:30, the seminar is almost half over, there would not be any use going to the seminar", so she did not go to the seminar.

Another friend of mine also got late to the seminar because he had some last minute work at the office. He reached at the seminar at 8 P.M. He still attended 50% of the seminar and benefited from it.

I had a talk with him regarding this, he said : "Something is better than nothing"
And after the seminar, he applied some of the learning's to his public speeches and won several Best Speaker awards at the Toastmasters meetings.

Its all about the attitude. The situation was same for both of them, one of them looked at the positive side, another cribbed about the negative side.

Which side will you prefer to 'look at' in your life ??

The happiest people

2008-09-27T09:55:00.000-07:00

In the picture, just look at their condition.....

no place to sleep, still they have

made some space for d cat n d dog.......

water pouring from the roof but still

each 1 of them have a peaceful smile on their face......

Isn't that Simply amazing!!!!!

The happiest people in the world are not those who have no problems,

but those who do something to deal with their problems.

I am a Proud Sponsor of Huge EC Contest

2008-09-19T10:32:00.000-07:00

I am feeling proud to be one of the proud sponsors of :

HUGE ENTRECARD CONTEST :

70000 Credits and Lots of

Other Prizes to be won

This huge contest is being run by FREEBIE REPORTER

The best part is that even though I am a sponsor, I can participate as well !!
I want to win the FiRsT pRiZe in the contest. I am thinking positive that I will win...lol

OK lets get started. As a celebration for the new look of FreebieReporter.com, we’re holding a huge contest.How huge? Well thanks to our sponsors we will be giving away more than 70,000 Entrecard Credits and lots of other great prizes. There are many ways to win this contest, but first take a look at the prizes:

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The Top 50 Productivity Blogs

2008-09-15T07:32:00.000-07:00

I love productivity blogs — they’re probably my greatest waste of time. But as they teach me to better use my time, I don’t consider it a waste. If you like reading about productivity, goals, habits, GTD, time management and other such topics, I’ve compiled a list of the best productivity sites for your perusal.

Now, you might not like all of these, but there are some real gems here — and many of them aren’t that well known. I suggest you give them a look, browse their archives, and if you like what you see, try a test subscription (you can always unsubscribe later).

Here’s the list:

The A List

Lifehacker

43 Folders

Lifehack.org

Web Worker Daily

Get Rich Slowly

Dumb Little Man

Steve Pavlina

The Rest of Us (not in any order)

Wise Bread Personal Finance Forum

Positive Thinking

The Simple Dollar

LifeDev

David Seah

What’s the next action

Getting Things Done

Scott H Young

Productivity501

Black Belt Productivity

LifeClever

Productivity Cafe

steve-olson.com

Pick the Brain

The Daily Saint

Daily PlanIt

Life Optimizer

Leadership Training | Cultivate Greatness

The Cranking Widgets Blog

My Empty Bucket

HD Biz Blog

Open Loops

Motivational Speaker - Craig Harper

Your Life. Organized.

Effective Time Management

Laura Stack - The Productivity Pro

Make It Great! with Phil Gerbyshak

Slacker Manager

Managing with Aloha

Getting Finances Done

Neat Living Blog

GTD Wannabe

Organize IT

Matt’s Idea Blog

Ian’s Messy Desk

Passion Meets Purpose

patrickrhone.com

Achieve IT!

Personal Development For A Greater Life

The Positivity Blog

Change your thoughts

Legal Andrew

ProductivityGoal

Success Begins Today

This list isn’t intended to be comprehensive. Give me your favorites in the comments, and your thoughts on the blogs on this list.

5 Easy Ways to Simplify Your Life

2008-09-11T12:31:00.000-07:00

Sometimes life becomes a little complex, and you need a workaround, some way to get past your usual obstacles and to trick yourself into keeping things simple. I use these tricks myself, and I’ve found them to be effective in many cases.

Also, don’t try to implement all of them — that would be far from simple. Not all of them will apply to your life anyway. Pick one or two and try them out.

Simple tricks to simplify your life:

1. Create a no-distractions zone. This is great for when you want to do some focused work — which is just about every day for most of us. Create a zone with no distractions — no phones, no email, no co-workers or kids or spouses, nothing on the walls, no IM or Twitter, no web surfing. Just the tools you need to do your work and nothing else. You could also create a time within your schedule for this distraction-free zone — say 8-10 a.m., for example. No distractions within that block of time. You can do email and phone calls before and after, but not during. I like this trick for when I need to do some writing but have a hard time concentrating.

2. Create a short-list. This is for the big-picture simplifying. If you’re having a hard time getting your life to something truly simple, create a short list of things you love doing most. This should be 4-5 things. For me, that’s writing, reading, listening music and spending time with my loved ones :)
Your short list will be different. Then, try to eliminate everything in your life that’s not on the short list, to make room for the things you love.

3. Only one Task in this moment. This is good for those who tend to be all over the place. Don’t allow yourself to switch between tasks. When you’re working on a report or writing an article, don’t do anything else. When you’re processing email, get to empty and do nothing else. One task at a time … finish the task … move on to the next. Try this for one day, focusing on it completely for that day. If it works for you, try it again the next day.

4. Limit yourself to 3 tasks for a day. If your to-do list is long and overwhelming, pick three tasks you want to do today — important tasks that aren’t just urgent but actually have a long-lasting impact on your life. Focus on getting these three tasks done before anything else. If you finish early, you can either call it a day or get some bonus tasks done.

5. Start your day with peace. This one is so easy to implement and yet it can have such a powerful effect on your day. When you first rise, do something that is calming and peaceful. That might be having a cup of coffee, watching the sunrise with your lover, meditating or yoga, walking on grass naked feet … whatever works well for you. It can be 10 minutes or an hour, but find some peace in the morning and use it to calm you throughout your entire day.

“Reduce the complexity of life by eliminating the needless wants of life, and the labors of life reduce themselves.” - Edwin Way Teale

Stop Comparing Yourself to Others

2008-08-26T08:40:00.000-07:00

“Enjoy your own life without comparing it with that of another.” - Marquis de Condorcet

If you took the strengths of others, and compared them to your weaknesses, how do you think you’d size up? And do you think this would make you feel good?

The funny thing is, this is what most of us do at one time or another — and some of us do pretty often.

It’s a sure-fire recipe for a drop in self-confidence and for unhappiness. It’s also not that useful.

Let’s say I take a look at someone who creates amazing artwork and really top-notch podcasts on their website … and I look at my art and video skills, and realize that I don’t come close to measuring up. In fact, I look pretty pitiful (I’m a lousy drawer and don’t know anything about video).

But wait a minute: it’s not a fair comparison. Just because I don’t measure up doesn’t mean I should get out of the blogging business, or that I should get depressed or jealous or resentful. Instead, if I looked at my strengths — writing useful and honest posts — I can see that I have a lot to offer, a lot to be happy about.

And that’s so important — being able to look at your own strengths, and see your true value. It’s actually one of the keys to success, because without this ability, you will be unmotivated, and won’t believe in yourself.

My quick advice: try to be aware of when you start comparing yourself to others … once you’ve developed this awareness, try this trick: stop yourself. Tell yourself, “Stop that!” And then start thinking about all the things you DO have, the things you love, the people you have, the blessings that life has given you. Make this a regular practice, and you’ll start to be happier with your life.

The Effects of Social Comparisons
But let’s take a look for a moment at what’s wrong with comparing yourself with others:

Like I said, it’s usually an unfair comparison to start with. As a result, you’ll always come off bad if you look at someone’s strengths (including what they have, like houses and cars) and your weaknesses.
Even if you compare strength to strength, there will always be those who are better, and those who are worse. Where you are on the ladder of accomplishments or purchases has nothing to do with what you want to do.
Even if you do well in comparison with others, you may be artificially inflated from this comparison. It’s a short-lived boost of ego if you win the comparison — easily knocked down.
You end up resenting others for doing well, without really knowing the true person. You can see this if you’ve ever resented someone upon first meeting them, and then later realized you got the wrong idea.
You might end up talking about your own accomplishments more than is necessary. No one appreciates that.
You might criticize someone in public, trying to knock them down, often unfairly.

These aren’t good things. Let’s look at how to stop this phenomenon.

Breaking the Habit of Comparing Yourself With Others
So how do you break this cycle of comparing yourself with others? Here are some tips I’ve found useful:

Awareness. Most often we do these social comparisons without realizing we’re doing it. It’s a natural act, I suppose, and as a result it’s something that is done without consciousness. So the solution is to become conscious — bring these thoughts to the forefront of your consciousness by being on the lookout for them. If you focus on these thoughts for a few days, it gets much easier with practice, and soon it’ll be hard not to notice.
Stop yourself. Once you realize you’re doing these comparisons, give yourself a pause. Don’t berate yourself or feel bad — just acknowledge the thought, and gently change focus.
Count your blessings. A better focus is on what you do have, on what you are already blessed with. Count what you have, not what you don’t. Think about how lucky you are to have what you have, to have the people in your life who care about you, to be alive at all.
Focus on your strengths. Instead of looking at your weaknesses, ask yourself what your strengths are. Celebrate them! Be proud of them. Don’t brag, but feel good about them and work on using them to your best advantage.
Be OK with imperfection. No one is perfect — intellectually, we all know that, but emotionally we seem to feel bad when we don’t reach perfection. You aren’t perfect and you never will be. I certainly am not, and I’ve learned to be OK with that. Sure, keep trying to improve, but don’t think you’ll ever be the “perfect person”. If you look at it in a different way, that imperfection is what makes you who you are, you already are perfect.
Don’t knock others down. Sometimes we try to criticize others just to make ourselves look or feel better. Taking someone else down for your benefit is destructive. It forms an enemy when you could be forming a friend. In the end, that hurts you as well. Instead, try to support others in their success — that will lead to more success on your part.
Focus on the journey. Don’t focus on how you rank in comparison to others — life is not a competition. It’s a journey. We are all on a journey, to find something, to become something, to learn, to create. That journey has nothing to do with how well other people are doing, or what they have. It has everything to do with what we want to do, and where we want to go. That’s all you need to worry about.
Learn to love enough. If you always want what others have, you will never have enough. You will always want more. That’s an endless cycle, and it will never lead to happiness. No matter how many clothes you buy, no matter how many houses you own (seven, in the case of one famous candidate), no matter how many fancy cars you acquire … you’ll never have enough. Instead, learn to realize that what you have is already enough. If you have shelter over your head, food on the table, clothes on your back, and people who love you, you are blessed. You have enough. Anything you have over and above that — and let’s admit that all of us reading this blog have more than that — is more than enough. Be good with that, and you’ll find contentment.

“To love is to stop comparing.” - Bernard Grasset
So, What do you think about this post ?? Tell me in the comments section.

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10 Deadly Sins of Negative Thinking

2008-08-20T10:05:00.000-07:00

I wish I had a dime for every time I heard someone making a negative comment about me, about others, about themselves. That last is really the worst. I could retire on those dimes.

The thing is, life could be so much better for many people, if they would just spot their negative thinking habits and replace them with positive ones.

Negative thinking, in all its many-splendored forms, has a way of creeping into conversations and our thinking without our noticing them. The key to success, in my humble opinion, is learning to spot these thoughts and squash them like little bugs. Then replace them with positive ones. You’ll notice a huge difference in everything you do.

As the Dalai Lama said, “The way to overcome negative thoughts and destructive emotions is to develop opposing, positive emotions that are stronger and more powerful.”

10 Deadly Sins of Negative Thinking

1. I will be happy once I have _____ (or once I earn $X).

Solution: Learn to be happy with what you have, where you are, and who you are, right at this moment. Happiness doesn’t have to be some state that we want to get to eventually — it can be found right now. Learn to count your blessings, and see the positive in your situation. This might sound simplistic, but it works.

2. I wish I were as ____ as (a celebrity, friend, co-worker).

Solution: Stop comparing yourself to others, and look instead at yourself — what are your strengths, your accomplishments, your successes, however small? What do you love about yourself? Learn to love who you are, right now, not who you want to become. There is good in each of us, love in each of us, and a wonderful human spirit in every one of us.

3. Seeing others becoming successful makes me jealous and resentful.

Solution: Learn to admire the success of others, and learn from it, and be happy for them, by empathizing with them and understanding what it must be like to be them. And then turn away from them, and look at yourself — you can be successful too, in whatever you choose to do.

Look those below you — there are always millions of people worse off than you, people who couldn’t even read this article or afford a computer. In that light, you are a huge success.

4. I am a miserable failure — I can’t seem to do anything right.

Solution: See your successes and ignore your failures. It hurts to think negative. You may want to check out 10 Deadly Sins of Negative Thinking Look back on your life, in the last month, or year, or 5 years. And try to remember your successes. If you have trouble with this, start documenting them — keep a success journal, either in a notebook or online. Document your success each day, or each week.

When you look back at what you’ve accomplished, over a year, you will be amazed. It’s an incredibly positive feeling.

5. I’m going to beat so-and-so no matter what — I’m better than him. And there’s no way I’ll help him succeed — he might beat me.

Solution: Learn to see success as something that can be shared, and learn that if we help each other out, we can each have a better chance to be successful. Two people working towards a common goal are better than two people trying to beat each other up to get to that goal. There is more than enough success to go around. Learn to think in terms of abundance rather than scarcity.

6. Dammit! Why do these bad things always happen to me?

Solution: See bad things as a part of the ebb and flow of life. Suffering is a part of the human condition — but it passes. All pain goes away, eventually. Meanwhile, don’t let it hold you back. Don’t dwell on bad things, but look forward towards something good in your future. And learn to take the bad things in stride, and learn from them. Bad things are actually opportunities to grow and learn and get stronger, in disguise.

7. You can’t do anything right! Why can’t you be like Johnny?

Solution: Take the mistakes or bad behavior of others as an opportunity to teach. Show them how to do something. Second, praise them for their positive behavior, and encourage their success. Last, and most important, love them for who they are, and celebrate their differences.

8. Your blog sucks. It’s super lame. You should stop writing, because you’re a moron and I hope you never reproduce.

Solution: Learn to offer constructive solutions, first of all. Instead of telling someone their blog sucks, or that a post is lame, offer some specific suggestions for improvement. Help them get better. If you are going to take the time to make a comment, make it worth your time. Second, learn to interact with people in a more positive way — it makes others feel good and it makes you feel better about yourself. And you can make some great friends this way. That’s a good thing.

9. Oh yeah? Well up yours too!

Solution: Let the insults or negative comments of others slide off you like Teflon. Don’t let their problem become yours. In fact, try to understand their problem more — why would someone say something like that? What problems are they going through? Having a little empathy for someone not only makes you understand that their comment is not about you, but it can make you feel and act in a positive manner towards them — and make you feel better about yourself in the process.

10. I don’t think I can do this — I don’t have enough discipline. Maybe some other time.

Solution: Turn your thinking around: you can do this! You don’t need discipline. Find ways to make yourself a success at your goal. If you fail, learn from your mistakes, and try again. Instead of putting a goal off for later, start now. And focus on one goal at a time, putting all of your energy into it, and getting as much help from others as you can. You can really move mountains if you start with positive thinking.

1. How to feel happy :)
2. Live in the moment, Enjoy Life !!
3. How to motivate yourself
4. Thinking Positive
5. 7 Powerful Tips to Get the Maximum Out of Any Situation

8 Practical Ways to Deal with Pessimists

2008-08-19T12:28:00.000-07:00

We have all had them as we set and go after our goals, no matter where we are or what our goals may be: naysayers, Pessimists, people who poke fun or get angry or tell us we can’t do it.

Pessimists feel its very important for them to make the other person feel low.Don’t let them stop you or even slow you down.

How do you deal with Pessimists? Each one will be different, but here are a few tips:

First learn to identify them. Sometimes we don’t realize that someone is behaving as a pessimist. They may be a close friend or spouse or other trusted person, so when they scoff or say negative things, we trust them and take it to heart. But there’s a difference between being realistic and just being a naysayer. Learn to listen to what others are saying, and see what your reaction is. If it discourages you, makes you feel like quitting, then maybe this person is being a pessimist

See if they have a valid point. Like I said, sometimes they are just trying to be realistic. They might have a good reason for their negativity. Step back, objectively think about whether they are bringing up a real obstacle that must be overcome, and if so, figure out how to overcome it. It’s rarely insurmountable. If you want it enough, you can figure out a solution. Now, if they don’t have a valid point, read on.

Zap any negative thoughts they give you. Pessimists have a way of taking their negative thoughts and transferring them to you. Suddenly, there’s a seed of doubt. And it can grow into a huge oak tree of doubt, with roots that tear up the foundation of your goals. Stop those negative thoughts as soon as possible. Push them out, and think positive thoughts instead. Don’t let them overcome you.

Realize that there will always be Pessimsts, and let them slide off you like water on a duck’s back. In every person’s life, there will be at least one person who would try to discourage you, if not more. You cannot completely avoid them. But you don’t need to listen to them. Just smile, and let them talk. Their words cannot stop you. They have no effect on you if you ignore their words.

Confront them, and get them on your side. Sometimes the pessimist is someone close to you, someone you cannot ignore. If so, it’s best to enlist the help of this person instead of fighting against them. Do this as early as possible. Tell them that this goal is very important to you, and you cannot do it without their help. Tell them that you realize they have doubts, but you really need them to be positive, and support you. They can be your best ally, instead of your worst demotivator.

Laugh with them. Sometimes people are uncomfortable when you make a change, and so in order to ease this discomfort, they will make jokes or tease you. This probably has less to do with you than it does with their discomfort. They don’t know how else to deal with this change. Realize this, and just laugh. If you take it as a good-natured joke, sometimes this will disarm them. They may continue to make jokes, but it won’t be as tense and won’t have as much an effect on you if you just keep laughing.

Have counterarguments ready, and inform them. Sometimes people are just misinformed. They might have misunderstandings about what you are doing. Know all of their arguments, and the common potential arguments, and have counterarguments ready. Do your research, and be very informed. Then try to educate the person who is trying to discourage you. If you do it right, with a positive, sincere attitude, you might actually get the person to listen, and perhaps even change their mind. If not, at the very least you know better, and you don’t let their arguments create doubt in your mind.

Be secure in the knowledge that you are doing something good. Sometimes there’s nothing you can do. You can’t win them over, you can’t avoid them, you can’t laugh with them. So you have to just ignore them, and keep telling yourself that when you do achieve your goal, that will be your reward.

Again, there will always be people who would try to discourage you. But they are just more obstacles that you have to overcome to get to your goal. There will always be obstacles, but if you think positive, and seek solutions, you can beat them

1. How to feel happy :)
2. Thinking Positive
3. Feeling Depressed ?? 6 Ways to Pick Yourself Up !!
4. What is Fear ?? - False Evidence Appearing Real
5. How to feel calm & have peace of mind.....

Feeling Depressed ?? 6 Ways to Pick Yourself Up !!

2008-08-19T12:22:00.000-07:00

From time to time, we all get a little down, maybe even a little depressed. Maybe we are feeling overwhelmed, or feel bad because we’re not doing well with our goals. There are many reasons for feeling down, and I’m not qualified to discuss all of them, their implications, or clinical treatment. What I can talk about are some things that have worked for me.

Feeling a little depressed can interfere with achieving our goals. We know we should be doing something, but we just don’t feel like doing anything. This can last for a long time if you don’t head it off as soon as possible and take action. Here are some of the things that work best for me:

Make a list. Sometimes we are depressed simply because we are overwhelmed with all the things we have to do that we haven’t gotten around to doing. So all the “stuff” that’s in our head can overwhelm us. Start simply by picking up a piece of paper and a pen, and making a list of the most pressing things you have to do. Sometimes it’s work stuff, sometimes it’s stuff around the house that’s bothering us, sometimes it’s goal tasks, or a combination of these and more. Simply making a list can be a big relief — you’re getting things under control. You can see, right in front of you, what you need to do, and that alone can pick up your mood.

Take action. You’ve made a list, and you still feel overwhelmed? Well, get started on the first thing you need to do. Is it a big task? Break it down and just do the smallest task, something just to get you started. Once you get started, once you get into action, you’ll feel better. Trust me. You might still feel overwhelmed, but at least you’re doing something. And once you start doing something, you’ve got momentum, and that feels much better than lying around feeling sorry for yourself.

Shower and groom yourself. Laying around in your underwear, smelling bad, is not going to do you any good. Simply showering, and feeling clean, can do wonders for your mood. Brush your teeth, comb your hair, shave, do whatever it is that you need to do to feel clean and good about yourself. Instant pick me up!

Get out of the house and do something. Sometimes, if you stay home lying around, feeling depressed, just getting out (after showering and grooming) will change your mood. Staying home all the time can really get you down, and you may not realize this until you go out and do something. Preferably something on your list (see No. 1).

Play some lively music. I like Brown Eyed Girl, the Kinks, the Ramones, or an upbeat Beatles tune, but you might have your own brand of feel-good music. Whatever it is, crank it up, and let yourself move to the beat. It may just be what the doctor ordered.

Talk about it. Got a significant other, best friend, family member, co-worker you can talk to? Bend their ear. That’s what they’re their for. If you don’t, there are hotlines, or professionals, you can talk to. And then there’s always online forums. These are great places to find someone to talk to. Getting things off your chest makes a big difference, and can be a huge lift. It can also help you work out the reasons you’re feeling down.

1. How to feel happy :)
2. Thinking Positive
3. Feeling Depressed ?? 6 Ways to Pick Yourself Up !!
4. What is Fear ?? - False Evidence Appearing Real
5. How to feel calm & have peace of mind.....

The Best Guide to Happiness that you will definitely cherish

2008-08-19T11:16:00.000-07:00

“The Constitution only guarantees the American people the right to pursue happiness. You have to catch it yourself.” - Benjamin Franklin

For some of us, the ultimate goal in life is happiness.

Whether we see fulfillment in our work, contentment in our relationships, passion in our hobbies … we strive to find happiness.

And yet, this search for happiness can be a lifelong search, especially if we look at happiness as something that will come once we achieve certain goals — a nice home, a perfect spouse, the ultimate promotion … and when we get these goals, instead of being happy, we often are looking forward to being happy when we meet our next goals.

Happiness shouldn’t be something that happens to us in the future, maybe someday, if things go well. Happiness should be here and now, who we are now, with the people we’re with now, doing the things we’re doing now. And if we’re not with people who make us happy, and doing things that make us happy … then we should take action to make that happen.

That’s the simple formula for happiness. Take action to do the things that make you happy, with the people who make you happy, and to be happy with the person you are now. (Disclaimer: this probably doesn’t apply, of course, to those who are clinically depressed or who have other similar medical conditions which I am not qualified to discuss.)

Don’t wait for happiness. Seize it.

“If you want to be happy, be.” - Leo Tolstoy

Here’s how — a list of action you can take today to seize that happiness. You don’t have to do these all at once, but you should do most (if not all) of them eventually, and sooner rather than later. Pick one or two and start today.

Be present. Don’t think about how great things will be in the future. Don’t dwell on what did or didn’t happen in the past. Learn to be in the here and now, and experience life as it’s happening, and appreciate the world for the beauty that it is, right now. Practice makes perfect with this crucial skill.

Spend time with those you love. Spending time with the people you love is extremely important to happiness … and yet it’s incredible how often we do just the opposite, and spend time alone, or disconnected from those we love, or spend time with people we don’t much like. Make it a priority to schedule time with the people you love. Make that your most important item of the day. For myself, I have a time when I cut off work, and the rest of the day is for my loved ones, by setting aside this sacred time, I ensure my happiness by letting nothing come between me and the people I love most.

Do the things you love. What do you love doing most? Figure out the 4-5 things you love doing most in life, the things that make you happiest, and make those the foundation of your day, every day. Eliminate as much of the rest as possible. For me, the things I love doing are: writing, reading,listening to music,swimming, playing badminton and blogging...lol. I do those things every day, and very little else. It may take awhile to get your life down to your essentials like I have (it took me a few years of careful elimination and rescheduling and saying “no” to requests that aren’t on my short list), but it’s worth the effort.

Focus on the good things. Everyone’s life has positive and negative aspects — whether you’re happy or not depends largely on which aspects you focus on. Did you lose today’s softball game? At least you got to spend time with friends doing something fun. Did you sprain your ankle running? Well, your body probably needed a week’s rest anyway, as you were running too much! Did your baby get sick? Well, at least it’s only a flu virus and nothing life-threatening … and at least you have a wonderful baby to nurse to health! You can see my point — almost everything has a positive side, and focusing on the positives make all the difference. My Auntie Kerry died last week, and I’m still grieving, but 1) I’m happy I spent time with her before her death; 2) her death has brought our family closer together; 3) her suffering has ended; and 4) it reminded me to spend more time with the people I love while they’re still alive.

Do work you love. An extension, of course, of doing the things you love, but applied to work. Are you already doing the work you love? Then you’re one of the lucky ones, and you should appreciate how lucky you are. If you aren’t doing the work you love, you should make it a priority to try to find work you’re passionate about, and to steer your career in that direction.

Be grateful. Learning to be grateful for what’s in our lives, for the people who have enriched our lives, goes a long way toward happiness. It helps us to appreciate what we have and what we have received, and the people who have helped us.

Simplify your life. You can check out : How to Simplify your life and feel calm It is really about identifying the things you love (see above) and then eliminating everything else as much as possible. By simplifying your life in this way, you create time for your happiness, and you reduce the stress and chaos in your life. In my experience, living a very simple life is also a pleasure in itself.

Slow down. Similar to simplifying, slowing down is just a matter of reminding yourself that there’s no need to rush through life. Schedule less things on your calendar, and more space between things. Learn to eat slower, drive slower, walk slower (unless you’re doing it for exercise). Going slowly helps to reduce stress, and improve the pleasure of doing things, and keeps you in the present moment.

Meditate. The simplest form of meditation can really help you to be present and to get out of the worrying part of your head. You can do it right now: close your eyes and simply try to focus on your breathing as long as possible. Pay attention to the breath as it comes into your body, and then as it goes out. When you feel your mind start to wander, don’t fret, but just simply acknowledge the other thoughts, and then return to your breathing. Do this a little each day and you’ll get better at it.

Learn to accept. One of the challenges for people like me — people who want to improve themselves and change the world — is learning to accept things as they are. Sometimes it’s better to learn to accept, and to love, the world as it is, and people as they are, rather than to try to make everything and everyone conform to an impossible ideal. I’m not saying you should accept cruelty and injustice, but learn to love things when they are less than “perfect”.

Find the miracles in life. I absolutely believe in miracles, and believe that they are all around us, every day. My children are all miracles. The kindnesses of strangers are miracles. The life growing all around us is a miracle. Find those miracles in your life, and enjoy the majesty of them.

“Happiness is the meaning and the purpose of life, the whole aim and end of human existence.”

- Aristotle

1. How to feel happy :)
2. 51 little pleasures to Brighten up Your Day
3. Live in the moment, Enjoy Life !!
4. How to Simplify your life and feel calm
5. How to feel calm & have peace of mind.....

7 Powerful Tips to Get the Maximum Out of Any Situation

2008-08-19T11:03:00.000-07:00

It’s always been my belief that whatever you make the focus of your life is what you’ll get.

If you long for money, fame and adulation, then you’ll take action to achieve it, and you’ll get it in the end. If you want to make your life simpler, more efficient and more productive, then similarly you’ll live your life in a way that will drive you to get those things. If you just want a quiet life away from the world, that’s what you’ll find.

And that raises an interesting idea… When you get right down to it, there’s only really one thing you can ever truly control: your intentions. What are the intentions you have for your life? What goals are you striving towards each and every day? What do you do with your life? What are you leading yourself towards?

Big questions to ask yourself, and often no easy answers.

here’s 7 powerful ways to make sure you’re going to get the most of out any situation in life:

In every situation, ask yourself “What do I want to get out of this?”. You need to know what your aim is. Ever get into an argument where you forgot what you were arguing about, but you knew you had to be right? Know what you’re going to try and end up with in any given situation, and you’ll be able to achieve it far more easily, with far less stress and friction.

Don’t assume the worst in people. There’s an old saying, “If a man thinks he’ll die tomorrow, he’ll probably find a way to make it happen.” If you look for faults in your partner, or expect them to cheat, you’ll push them away and only make it more likely. If you expect friends to fail you, you’ll set them up to do it. Try and look for the good in people, and treat them how you want to be treated yourself.

Respect everyone. Not just the people you like, or the people you get along with, but everyone. Forgive the people who do you wrong. Take time to help those who wouldn’t help you. You can get some tips from : Building beautiful relationships. Reach out to people who would harm you. If you see someone sitting alone, take a walk across the room and say hi. Make time for people in your life. You’d be amazed at the difference it makes in your attitude to life.

Walk away when you’re angry. If you’ve got a hot head, you’re not going to be thinking straight. Take some time to cool off, then come back and look at why you got upset, remember that the other person is probably upset too, and then try and see it from their point of view. Always remember, if you believed as they do, you’d probably argue just as hard. Respect their point of view, and let them voice their opinion. That way, they’ll be more likely to do the same for you.

Slow down. We live in a world where we’re used to instant gratification of every desire. However, there’s something to be said for perseverance. Like Guinness say, it takes 119.5 seconds to pour the perfect pint. Some things take time, but that’s OK. Let it come when it’s ready. And while you’re waiting, you can look at whether what you’re waiting for is really what you want.

Tell others what you’re aiming for. Even I did the same : I am Attempting a Personal Goal of Reaching 1,000 Subscribers in 100 Days. If other people know what you’re trying to do, what you’re focusing on, then firstly they might be able to help, and second they’ll be able to hold you accountable. Making excuses to yourself is pretty easy.

Take responsibility for your actions. If you screw up, admit it to yourself. Taking your eye off the ball is OK, as long as you re-focus, and get back on track. A boat is off course most of the time its en route to its destination. But it still gets there. How? Because the navigator makes tiny adjustments contently, to get it where it’s meant to go. Do the same with your life. It’s not about making one big leap to perfection, but tiny little changes every day, until you get there.

1. Improve Your Life - Commitments !!
2. The Phenomenal Power of Focus !!
3. Think about Goals for your life !!
4. How to motivate yourself
5. 5 Easy Ways to Simplify Your Life

Are You a "Star Dropper" ??

2008-08-19T09:24:00.000-07:00

Being an entrecard member, I have observed that many people drop on me quite regularly. So I have decided to show my gratitude towards them by rewarding them by GIVING A "I AM A STAR DROPPER AWARD".

This is my way to say thank you for dropping on me so many times !!

How it works:
I count "Star droppers" as those people that have dropped on me or either on "Lovely Relationships" at least 8 times ever !! I will check to see who my top droppers are in the statistics page of Entrecard, and the qualifying ones will be sent a personal message or email that they have got the award !! Those who are the "Top Droppers" aka The "Star Droppers" can grab the "I am a Star Dropper Trophy from me AND FLAUNT IT ON YOUR BLOG/WEBSITE. You can grab it from my sidebar...

I have noticed that at Entrecard's statistics page, Only the list of Top ten Droppers list for 30 days is displayed, then it gets refreshed, So I can only see the Top 10 Droppers. But there might be more who have dropped on me or either on "Lovely Relationships" more than 8 times.

So if you feel that you have dropped on either of us 8 times or more, drop me an email, as this can easily by checked on your Entrecard profile and I will send you your "The Star Droppers" Trophy. You can also grab it from my sidebar. >>

So if you want to be a "Star dropper", then get dropping!

19 Powerful Ways to Free Up 1 Hour everyay for Your Goals !!

2008-08-19T08:47:00.000-07:00

“Our life is frittered away by detail. Simplify, simplify.” - Henry David Thoreau

What would you do if you had an extra hour a day?

This is a common barrier I run into when I write about making positive life changes: people don’t have time to pursue their dreams. People don’t have time to exercise. People don’t have time to get organized.

Well, it’s time to make time.

By using some combination of the following, you can free up an hour or more a day. Find the ones that work for you, and then carve out that hour a day.

Then make sure you use that extra hour a day in the best way possible — book that hour on your calendar for something you really, really want to do, whether that’s work on a goal, write a book, start a business, exercise, read more, or whatever. Don’t waste this gift of time!

Make an appointment right after work. Whether it’s exercise or working on some other goal, make an appointment to do it right when you get out of work (at 5 p.m., for example). This works especially well if you have to meet someone else, such as a workout partner or other group or team or coach or partner. You’ll be sure to meet the appointment, which means you won’t stick around work too long, and you’ll be sure to finish all your tasks on time so you can leave on time. This makes you more efficient in the afternoon especially.

Wake up earlier. I’ve found time for goals that are important to me by waking a bit earlier. Exercise, writing, reading — I do those now early in the day, so it doesn’t interfere with family time. Early in the day works well for me and many others, simply because there’s not much going on to distract or interrupt at this time of day.

Brown bag it. Many people I know take an hour or more for lunch. While a relaxing lunch can be a good thing, if you take lunch to work, you can eat quickly and either spend the extra time
1) working on a goal
2) getting work done so you can leave earlier. Plus, brown bagging it saves money too.

Figure out your core work activities. What is it that you really have to do each day? I mean, the stuff you have to do or your job would fall apart. If you really think about it, a lot of the tasks you do each day (and phone calls and emails, mentioned above, are included in these tasks) don’t really need to be done each day. Sometimes you can do them less often, sometimes you don’t need to do them at all. If you can learn to focus on your core activities, you can get your work done in less time.

Delegate. Not everyone has this option, but if you can give some of the tasks on your list to others who are better suited to doing those tasks, you’ll free up time. Do you really need to be doing everything you do, or can some of those tasks be delegated?

Consolidate errands. If you routinely do errands throughout the week, you’re spending a lot of time driving. Instead, try to do all errands on one day, and plan out an efficient route. Most people will save at least an hour a week in total.

Know your priority. What is the one thing you need to do today? Get that done, above all else, and do it first. After you do that priority task, the rest is extra really. Cut back on some of the rest to free up time.

Shrink your task list. Once you’ve identified your core work activities and your top priority for the day, go over your task list and whittle it down to the essentials. Put tasks you don’t need to do now on a someday/maybe list, delete others, delegate others. Keep your task list down to the essentials, to keep from wasting time.

Say no. One of the biggest groups of time eaters is requests from other people. All day long we get requests, in person, on the phone, in email, through paperwork. Meetings, assignments, requests for information, requests to be on a committee or team … these are all requests that will eat up your time. Say no to all but the essentials.

Get to the point. While I’m a fan of long, slow conversations, if you’re trying to make time for goals, you need to whittle down needlessly long conversations — especially if it’s just with a co-worker who isn’t a close friend. In person or on the phone, you need to get straight to the point with a minimum of chit-chat, and if the other person isn’t getting to the point, politely ask what he needs from you.

Watch less TV. Many people watch hours of TV a day. You can easily save an hour a day if you cut TV out, or just watch your single favorite show each day. Don’t channel surf.

Read less online. If you’re like me, you can spend hours a day reading online. Limit your online reading and focus on your essential tasks.

Don’t talk long on the phone. Long phone conversations can eat up a lot of your time. Instead, know what you want to accomplish and try to get that done quickly. If someone else is calling you, encourage them to get to the point, and then wrap it up when you’re done. Tell them you have to go because you’ve got something else to get to.

Leave early. If you’re using these time-saving tips, you should be able to finish your essential work early. If so, don’t use the extra time to just do more work … leave early! Of course, you’ll probably have to talk to your boss about this, but many people have flexible hours and many bosses would be happy to let you go early if you get your work done. If you set your own hours, set an earlier time to leave and you’ll ensure that you get your work done by that time.

Educate others. Is there something that other people submit to you that you routinely have to edit or reformat? Teach these people (maybe with an FAQ or tutorial) how to do it right or how you need it so you don’t have to make changes. Are there mistakes people are doing that you routinely have to fix? Are there things you have to do yourself because others don’t know how to do it? Educate them, and save yourself tons of time. It takes time at first, but the payoff is huge.

Automate things. If people submit stuff to you, or if you routinely have to do routine work, find ways to have the process automated. Technology works wonders these days.

Just say, “That’s enough.” Often you are overloaded with information and tasks. But if you don’t respond to all of your emails today, or don’t read all of the posts in your RSS reader, or don’t get to all the tasks on your to-do lists … what will happen? If nothing drastic will happen, consider stopping when you’ve gotten to enough.

Start work early. If you work before everyone gets in the office, you won’t have constant interruptions and distractions. You’ll be amazed how much you can get done between 6 a.m. and 8 a.m. I used to do it when I worked in an office, and because I didn’t take a lunch break — I at ate my desk while working) I could get off at 2 p.m. and spend time with my kids.

Give others authority. If you have to approve things or make decisions, you might be a bottleneck — things move slower if they have to be channeled through you. Instead, give others the authority to make decisions — with clear instructions about what decisions should be made under what circumstances, and what the limits of their authority are. That’ll remove a bottleneck and free you up from having to make a bunch of huge decisions. Just have a way to monitor things as necessary.

The Phenomenal Power of Focus !!

2008-08-12T10:28:00.000-07:00

“Always remember, your focus determines your reality.” - Qui-Gon to Anakin, Star Wars Episode I

The quote above, as cheesy as George Lucas’ writing often is, contains a nugget of Jedi wisdom that I’ve repeatedly found to be true.

Your focus determines your reality.

It’s something we don’t think about much of the time, but give it some consideration now:

If you wake up in the morning and think about the miserable things you need to do later in the day, you’ll have a miserable day. If you wake up and focus instead on what a wonderful gift your life is, you’ll have a great day.
If we let our attention jump from one thing to another, we will have a busy, fractured and probably unproductive day. If we focus entirely on one job, we may lose ourselves in that job, and it will not only be the most productive thing we do all day, but it’ll be very enjoyable.
If we focus on being tired and wanting to veg out in front of the TV, we will get a lot of television watching done. If, however, we focus on being healthy and fit, we will become healthy and fit through exercise and good eating.

This may seem simplistic, but it’s completely true. This is the magical power of focus.

Let’s look at some of the ways you can use focus to improve different aspects of your life.

“All that we are is the result of what we have thought.” - Buddha

Focus on a Goal
In my experience, focus is the most important determination of whether you’ll achieve a goal or stick to creating a new habit. Not self-discipline, not rewards, not sheer willpower, not even motivation (also an important ingredient, however). If you can maintain your focus on a goal or habit, you will more often than not achieve that goal or create that habit.

If you can’t maintain your focus, you won’t achieve the goal, unless it’s such an easy goal that it would have happened anyway. It’s that simple.

Why does focus matter so much? Let’s say you decide you want to declutter your house — that’s your goal for this month. So the first day, you’re completely focused on this goal, and you get boxes and trash bags and fill them up with junk. The second day, you’re still focused, and you fill up a bunch more boxes and you’ve cleared most of two rooms with progress on another. This goes on for a few more days, with your focus being on this goal, and lots of progress made.

However, let’s say that a week into your decluttering, you decide you want to become a runner. You are now focused on running, and not only do you go out to jog for a few days, you buy running clothes and a Nike-equipped iPod and read running blogs and magazines. However, you’ve lost your focus on decluttering, and soon you aren’t doing much of it, because your focus is on running. In fact, you’ve added more clutter because you’ve bought all the running equipment and magazines and books.

Meanwhile, I have maintained my focus on decluttering the entire month, and by the end of the month, I have a nice, simplified house. I did it through focus.

This is why I am constantly advocating focusing on only one goal at a time. Having multiple goals spreads out your focus, and makes it less likely that you’ll complete any of the goals. It’s possible, but with a diffused focus, it’s much more difficult.

Even with only one goal, maintaining focus can be difficult. You need to find ways to keep your focus on that goal. Some good examples that work for me:

Read about your goal as much as possible, on websites and blogs and in books and magazines.
Post up reminders on your wall, refrigerator, and computer desktop.
Send yourself reminders using an online calendar or reminder service.
Tell as many people as possible about it, and post your progress on your blog.
Have a time each day to work on the goal, with a reminder in your schedule each day.

Maintain your focus on your goal, and you’ve won half the battle in achieving it.

Focus on Now
I’ve written about this before, but focusing on the present can do a lot for you. It helps reduce stress, it helps you enjoy life to the fullest, and it can increase your effectiveness.

Focusing on now, rather than the past (”I can’t believe she said that to me!”) or the future (”what am I going to say in the darn meeting today?”) isn’t easy, and takes a lot of practice.

Focus on the Task at Hand

Have you ever completely lost yourself in a task, so that the world around you disappears? You lose track of time and are completely caught up in what you’re doing. That’s the popular concept of Moving with the Flow, and it’s an important ingredient to finding happiness.

Having work and leisure that gets you in this state of flow will almost undoubtedly lead to happiness. People find greatest enjoyment not when they’re passively mindless, but when they’re absorbed in a mindful challenge.

How do you get into flow? Well, it takes a bit of practice, but the first step is to find work that you’re passionate about. Seriously — this is an extremely important step. Find hobbies that you’re passionate about. Turn off the TV — this is the opposite of flow — and get outside and do something that truly engages you.

Next, you need to clear away distractions and focus completely on the task you set before yourself. This is the part that takes a lot of practice. I’ll write more about this later.

Focus on the Positive
One of the key skills I’ve learned is how to be aware of my negative thoughts, and to replace them with positive thoughts. I learned this through quitting smoking and running — there are many times when you feel like giving up, and if you don’t catch these negative thoughts in time, they’ll fester and grow until you actually do give up.

Instead, learn to focus on the positive. Think about how great you feel. Think about how other people have done this, and so can you. Think about how good it will feel when you accomplish what you’re trying to do.

Also learn to see the positive in just about any situation. This results in happiness, in my experience, as you don’t focus on the bad parts of your life, but on the good things. B e Thankful for what you’ve been given.

What are your thoughts on focus? Share in the comments.

“We are what we think; as we desire so do we become! By our thoughts, desires, and habits, we either ascend to the full divine dignity of our nature, or we descend to suffer and learn.” - J. Todd Ferrier

Exclusive Interview: Stephen Covey on Getting Things Done, The Secret and His Morning Routine, Blogs and Technology

2008-08-12T08:42:00.000-07:00

It’s such a thrill to share with you this interview with one of my heroes, author Stephen Covey of The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People fame.

Covey, of course, is one of the inspirations of this site.

Besides The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, some of his other best-selling books First Things First, Principle Centered Leadership, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective Families and his most recent book : The 8th Habit: From Effectiveness to Greatness.

The 7 Habits include being proactive, beginning with the end in mind, putting first things first, thinking win/win, seeking first to understand, synergizing, and sharpening the saw. His 8th habit boils down to “Find your voice and inspire others to find theirs.” Indispensable reading.

I hope you enjoy this interview!

Ques : For a lot of people your books are so full of mind-blowing and life-changing ideas, that they get overwhelmed. They want to start, but don’t know how to. What would be the best first step they can take to make a positive change?

Covey: Listen to your conscience regarding something that you simply know you should do, then start small on it—make a promise and keep it. Then move forward and make a little larger promise and keep it. Eventually you’ll discover that your sense of honor will become greater than your moods, and that will give you a level of confidence and excitement that you can move to other areas where you feel you need to make improvements or give service.

Q: To give us some insight into your life, what is your typical morning routine on a work day, that incorporates some of your principles into your everyday life?

Covey: I make an effort every morning to win what I call the “private victory.” I work out on a stationary bike while I am studying the scriptures for at least 30 minutes. Then I swim in a home pool vigorously for 15 minutes, then I do yoga in a shallow part of the pool for 15 minutes. Then I go into my library and pray with a listening spirit, listening primarily to my conscience while I visualize the rest of my entire day, including important professional activities and key relationships with my loved ones, working associates and clients. I see myself living by correct principles and accomplishing worthy purposes. One of my favorite quotes is, “The greatest battles of life are fought out every day in the silent chambers of one’s own soul.” (David O. McKay) Much of this listening and visualizing work is very challenging, so I win the private victory when I have made my mind up and commit to live by correct principles and to serve worthy purposes.

Q: Do you have any thoughts you can share about filtering out the noise in life (especially noise from technology) to focus on the things that are truly important. How can we be sure to see time-sensitive emails but not live in our inboxes?

Covey: I am fortunate to have a very helpful team that enables me to spend time doing things that are important but not necessarily urgent. This requires the development of a personal mission statement to give a larger context and also the determination of what is truly important but not necessarily urgent. People who have no such team need to also make these larger decisions so that they can cheerfully say No to that which is urgent but not important. Learn to use technology in such a way as to filter out that which you really know is important to you personally and professionally. Remember, technology is a great servant, but a terrible master.

Q: What is your work setup? What tools do you use? What kind of computer and software are indispensable for you? How do you set things up to optimize your effectiveness?

Covey: I work with a complementary team, which means you build on your strengths and organize to make your weaknesses irrelevant. Modern technology is one of my weaknesses, but my associates make this weakness irrelevant because they are superb at it. I also find most meetings are a waste of time, because they are so ill-prepared and there’s little opportunity for true synergy in producing better solutions than what anyone originally thought of. So I work hard to only attend those meetings that have strategic importance and miss all kinds of other seemingly urgent meetings. I keep my phone number unlisted and rely on my associates to handle all voice mail, e-mail, faxes.

Q: Besides your books, what other reading would you recommend as indispensable, including books, magazines, websites, or blogs? Do you read blogs?

Covey: I don’t read blogs but occasionally people tell me about what they contain, and I do take questions that come from blogs. My team and I also make occasional blog postings and will do so more and more in the future. I believe that the habit of constant reading of good books and scholarly periodicals and magazines in many disciplines is vital to give a larger perspective and to constantly sense the interdependent nature of life. I probably average 2 hours per day reading. I also am sent many books for endorsement purposes, which enables me to stay relevant in my own field, and I have people that help me decide which ones I should read and endorse.

Q: Have you read Getting Things Done and The Secret? What are your thoughts on those two separate phenomena?

Covey: I have read these books and have enjoyed them and believe they contain elements of wisdom and practical suggestions. But for me and my world they are too simplistic and superficial.

“We may be very busy, we may be very efficient, but we will also be truly effective only when we begin with the end in mind.” - Stephen Covey

Improve Your Life - Commitments !!

2008-08-10T09:13:00.000-07:00

We all have commitments in life. Sometimes we spend too much time on the commitments which don't even matter much in our lives. This happens because we are not too much sure about our important commitments and the time which we should spend on them individually.

Here are some great tips to improve your lives by working on your commitments !!

“Commitment unlocks the doors of imagination, allows vision, and gives us the ‘right stuff’ to turn our dreams into reality.”
James Womack

All the commitments in your life.

Take an inventory of the commitments in your life. Here are some common ones:

Work - we have multiple commitments at our jobs. List them all.
Side work - some of us free-lance, or do odd jobs to take in money. More commitments.
Family - we may play a role as husband, wife, father, mother, son, daughter. These roles come with many commitments.
Kids - Your kids might have soccer, choir, Academic Challenge Bowl, National Junior Honor Society, basketball, spelling bee, and more. Each of their commitments are yours too.

Civic - we may volunteer for different organizations, or be a board member or officer on a non-profit organization.
Religious - many of us are very involved with our churches, or are part of a church organization. Or perhaps we are committed to going to service once a week.
Hobbies - perhaps you are a runner or a cyclist, or you build models, or are part of a secret underground comic book organization. These come with - surprise! - commitments.
Home - aside from regular family stuff, there’s the stuff you have to do at home.
Online - we may be a regular on a forum or mailing list or Google group. These are online communities that come with commitments too.

You might have other categories. List everything.

Now take a close look at each thing on the list, and consider:

How does this give my life value?

How important is it to me?

Is it in line with my life priorities and values?

How would it affect my life if I dropped out?

Does this further my life goals?

These are tough questions, but I suggest seeing if you can eliminate just one thing — the thing that gives you the least return for your invested time and effort. The thing that’s least in line with your life values and priorities and goals. Cut it out, at least for a couple weeks, and see if you can get along without it. Revisit this list at that time and see if you can cut something else out. Edit mercilessly, keeping only those that really mean something to you.

Each time you cut a commitment, it may give you a feeling of guilt, because others want you to keep that commitment. But it’s also a huge relief, not having to do that commitment each day or week or month. It frees up a lot of your time, and while others may be disappointed, you have to keep what’s important to you in mind, not everyone else. If we committed to what everyone else wanted all the time, we would never have any time left for ourselves.

Take the time to edit your commitments, and your life will be greatly simplified. You will thank yourself for it.

Simple Living : How to Simplify your life and feel calm

2008-08-10T08:46:00.000-07:00

Simplifying can sometimes be overwhelming. The amount of stuff you have in your life and the amount of things you have to do can be too big a mountain to tackle.

But you don’t have to simplify it all at once. Do one thing at a time, and take small steps. You’ll get there, and have fun doing it.

In fact, you can do little but important things today to start living the simple life.

The 10 most important things to Simplify your Life

And these are 10 simple things that you can do today. Not tomorrow, not next week, not next month. Today. Choose one and do it today. Tomorrow, choose another.

If you do these 10 things, you’ll have made great strides with little effort.

1. Make a short list. Take out a sheet of paper and fold it into a small square, perhaps 3×5 inches. Or take out an index card. Now make a short list of the 4-5 most important things in your life. What’s most important to you? What do you value most? What 4-5 things do you most want to do in your life? Simplifying starts with these priorities, as you are trying to make room in your life so you have more time for these things.

2. Drop 1 commitment. Think about all the things in your life that you’re committed to doing, and try to find one that you dread doing. Something that takes up time but doesn’t give you much value. Perhaps you’re on a team, or coaching something, or on a board or committee, or whatever. Something that you do each day or week or month that you don’t really want to do. Now take action today to drop that commitment. Call someone, send an email, telling the appropriate person or people that you just don’t have the time. You will feel relief. I’d recommend dropping all commitments that don’t contribute to your short list (from Item #1), but for today, just drop 1 commitment.

3. Purge a drawer. Or a shelf, or a countertop, or a corner of a room. Not an entire room or even an entire closet. Just one small area. You can use that small area as your base of simplicity, and then expand from there. Here’s how to purge: 1) empty everything from the drawer or shelf or corner into a pile. 2) From this pile, pick out only the most important things, the stuff you use and love. 3) Get rid of the rest. Right now. Trash it, or put it in your car to give away or donate. 4) Put the stuff you love and use back, in a neat and orderly manner.

4. Set limits. Basically, you set limits for things you do regularly: email, RSS posts, tasks, feeds, items in your life, etc. And try to stick with the limits. Today, all you have to do is set limits for a few things in your life. Tomorrow, try to stick with them.

5. Simplify your to-do list. Take a look at your to-do list. If it’s more than 10 items long, you can probably simplify it a bit. Try to find at least a few items that can be eliminated, delegated, automated, outsourced, or ignored. Shorten the list. This is a good habit to do once a week.

6. Free up time. Simplifying your life in general is a way to free up time to do the stuff you want to do. Unfortunately, it can be hard to find time to even think about how to simplify your life. If that’s the case, free up at least 30 minutes a day for thinking about simplifying. Or alternatively, free up a weekend and think about it then. How can you free up 30 minutes a day? Just a few ideas: wake earlier, watch less TV, eat lunch at your desk, take a walk for lunch, disconnect from the Internet, do email only once today, shut off your phones, do 1 less thing each day.

7. Clear your desk. I can personally attest to the amazing feeling that a clean desk can give you. It’s such a simple thing to do, and yet it does so much for you. If your desk is covered with papers and notes and gadgets and office supplies, you might not be able to get this done today. But here are the basic steps:

1) Clear everything off your desk and put it in a pile (either in your inbox or on the floor).

2) Process the pile from top to bottom, one item at a time. Do not defer decisions on any item — deal with them immediately and quickly.

3) For each item, either file it immediately, route it to someone else, trash it, or note it on your to-do list (and put it in an “action” folder). If it’s a gadget or office supply, find a place for it in your desk drawers (or get rid of it).

4) Repeat until your pile is empty and your desk is clear. Be sure to get rid of any knick knacks. Your desk should have your computer, your inbox, perhaps a notepad, and maybe a family photo (but not many). Ahh, a clear desk!

5) From now on, put everything in your inbox, and at least once a day, process it in the same way as above.

8. Clear out your email inbox. This has the same psychological effect as a clear desk. Is your email inbox always full of read and unread messages? That’s because you’re delaying decisions on your emails. If you have 50, let’s say, or fewer emails in your inbox, you can process them all today. If you have hundreds, you should put them in a temporary folder and get to them one chunk at a time (do 20 per day or something). Here’s how you process your inbox to empty — including emails already in your inbox, and all future incoming emails:

1) process them top to bottom, one at a time, deciding and disposing of each one immediately.

2) Your choices are to delete, archive, respond immediately (and archive or delete), forward (and archive or delete), or mark it with a star (or something like that) and note it on your to-do list to respond to later (and archive).

3) Process each email like that until the inbox is empty.

4) Each time you check your email, process to empty. Ahh, an empty inbox!

9. Move slower. We rush through the day, from one task to another, from one appointment to another, until we collapse on the couch, exhausted, at the end of the day. Instead, simplify your life by doing less (see Items 1, 4 and 5) and doing them more slowly. Eat Slower, Drive Slower, shower slower, work slower. Be more deliberate. Be present. This isn’t something you’re going to master today, but you can start practicing today.

10. Single-task. Instead of multi-tasking, Focus on one thing at a time. Remove all distractions, resist any urge to check email or do some other habitual task like that while you’re doing the task at hand. Stick to that one task, until you’re done. It’ll make a huge difference in both your stress level and your productivity.

12. 51 little pleasures to Brighten up Your Day

2008-07-27T10:10:00.001-07:00

A little trick I like to use to make my days much more pleasant is to find little, simple pleasures and sprinkle them throughout my day.

They’re not big things, but each simple pleasure can translate to a great day if you use them right.

So in the morning, I might have a cup of coffee, and sip it slowly to enjoy it fully. I might read a gripping novel, and revel in the world of fiction. I might watch the sun come up, and marvel at the world in pastel hues.

In the shower, closing my eyes, and just let the cool water run over me

Yeah, You get the idea — these are little things, and don’t really cost a thing (or not much, anyway), but they are tremendously gratifying. I’ve just described some of the things I might do to start off my day, but the possibilities are endless, and can be done throughout the day.

I thought it would be fun to compile a list of simple pleasures, to give you all some ideas of what I mean, and to spark other ideas of your own. Of course, you can probably come up with a thousand more, and it should also be noted that one person’s pleasures aren’t always pleasures for others.

Walking barefoot on grass.
Listening to good music in the car.
Taking a long, relaxing shower.
Iced Tea.
A good novel.
Popcorn and an old movie on DVD.
The smell of fresh-cut grass.
Watching the sunrise.
Walking on the beach.
A gentle morning run.
Watching the sunset.
Hugging your child tightly.
Dark chocolate.
Dancing like you’re crazy.
Telling jokes till your sides ache.
A long conversation with a good friend.
Being lazy on a Sunday.
Waking to a clean house.
Banana split.
Singing in the shower, loudly.
Dancing in the rain and stomping in puddles.
Watching your child play.
Fresh-baked chocolate chip cookies.
Helping someone in need.
Making someone smile.
Homemade pie.
A nature hike.
Laying back and watching the stars.
Making a sandcastle.
Floating in the water.
Taking an afternoon nap.
Watching your children on Christmas morning.
Laying back and looking up at clouds.
Watching the ocean.
Getting a massage.
Reese’s peanut butter cups.
Acting crazy in public.
Seeing your savings account grow.
Seeing your debt shrink.
Blowing bubbles.
A gentle breeze.
Watching your kids play soccer.
Playing a good game of basketball.
Fresh popped popcorn.
Fresh snow.
Swinging on a swing.
Homemade strawberry shake.
Watching animals in nature.
Staying up all night talking.
Having a picnic.
Swimming at night.

What are your little pleasures for the day ??? Let me know in the comments... :)

11. Think about Goals for your life !!

2008-07-27T10:09:00.002-07:00

There’s never a good time to sit down and think about what you want to accomplish in life. We have busy lives, and even when we’re not busy, we might just feel more like vegging in front of the TV or checking our feeds than thinking about the rest of our lives.

Do it today, if you haven’t yet. It could take as little as 10 or 20 minutes, and it could make all the difference in the world.

And it’s not that hard. You probably already have a good idea of what you want to do, but you may not have it written down. Or maybe you’ve done this exercise before, but you haven’t updated your goals for awhile. Now’s the time to do it.

1. How to start? First, think about what you’d like people to say about you at your funeral. This comes from Stephen Covey’s 7 Habits of Highly Effective People — the habit called “Begin with the end in mind.” It’s also very effective. Imagine you are at the end of your life, looking back. What would you like to have accomplished? What kind of person would you like to have been?

Now here’s the key: start living your life so that you will eventually get to that point.

2. Now that you’ve given that a little thought, jot down some ideas for life goals you’d like to achieve before you die.

They can be in many areas, but here are a few to start with: professional, education, family, spiritual, travel, recreation, hobbies, community, charity. You can probably think of more, and you don’t need to have goals in all of these areas. Just some topics to get you started.

3. Refine your list, or expand it. After your initial brainstorm, you may want to trim it down. But you may also want to expand: sometimes it’s fun, and worthwhile, to dream big.

4. Now break it down. What should you accomplish in the next 10 years for each of these goals? How about 5 years? How about two years? One year? And this month?

Once you’ve planned out each goal for 10-year, 5-year, 2-year, 1-year and 1-month periods, you’ve got yourself a pretty solid plan.

5. Take action! I like to take my monthly goals, and make a to-do list for this week. What can I do today to further my goals? And if I can get just one thing done, I’ve done a lot to make those dreams a reality!

Take a step towards your dreams today by writing them down, and making a plan.

10. Live in the moment, Enjoy Life !!

2008-07-27T10:09:00.001-07:00

How often have you eaten a meal and not really tasted it, or completed a chore or drove to work without really thinking about it?Our days often pass us by while our minds are elsewhere.One of my favorite methods of finding happiness and preventing stress is living in the moment — No one actually lives in the moment all the time — I don’t think it’s possible. Some, with practice, can learn to live in the moment for longer than most of us, but there will always be times when you’re worried about the future or thinking about the past, and forget to be in the moment.Being in the moment isn’t as easy as it sounds.It takes practice. But it can be achieved at times. To help inspire you to live in the moment, here are 2 great examples:

1. Children. There’s no one better at being present than a child. I love to watch my neighbor's son. He’s not thinking about what happened to him yesterday, or what he’s going to do later today. He’s Spiderman, and he’s fighting the bad guys, and nothing else in the world exists. If he gets mad about something, he overreacts, and nothing else in the world matters but what has upset him. But he’ll cry about it, and then soon return to normal, happy again, the offending situation forgotten without a grudge. He has no cares about tomorrow, and for that, I love to watch him. We need to use children as inspiration, and try to be like them sometimes. Jesus instructed us, “Be as a child,” and those were wise words.

2. Yourself, lost in something. You’ve been in the moment plenty of times. Can you remember a time when you lost yourself in a task? Not lost in thought, but lost in the doing of the task itself — you were concentrating fully, you thought of nothing else. The world disappeared. It might have been work — you might have achieved that state of mind known as “flow” — or it could have been a hobby, playing sports, fixing something, anything. Try to remember a time like that, and replicate it.

So, I would request all of you to start living in the moment. You must have heard :

Yesterday is history
Tomorrow is mystery
Today is God's gift to you....
That is why it's called 'The Present' !!!

9. Building beautiful relationships

2008-07-27T10:08:00.001-07:00

Relationships......Ah, the most important word in our lives. Something we cant live without, whether its a relationship with a friend, a lover, spouse, parents or colleagues....

The person who knows the art of cultivating relationships has a magic wand with him !!
You want one ?? Keep reading :)

Instead of recognizing the differences between yourself and others, try to recognize what you have in common. At the root of it all, we are all human beings. We need food, and shelter, and love. We crave attention, and recognition, and affection, and above all, happiness. Reflect on these commonalities you have with every other human being, and ignore the differences. This exercise comes from a great article from Ode Magazine — it’s a five-step exercise to try when you meet friends and strangers. Do it discreetly and try to do all the steps with the same person. With your attention geared to the other person, tell yourself:

Step 1: “Just like me, this person is seeking happiness in his/her life.”
Step 2: “Just like me, this person is trying to avoid suffering in his/her life.”
Step 3: “Just like me, this person has known sadness, loneliness and despair.”
Step 4: “Just like me, this person is seeking to fill his/her needs.”
Step 5: “Just like me, this person is learning about life.”

And then you will automatically develop a completely different approach in dealing with that person. You will notice that you are enjoying being with the other person. It will help you create better interpersonal relationships with others....

8. How to feel happy :)

2008-07-27T10:05:00.000-07:00

We all know that money can’t buy happiness … but many times we act as if we’d be happier with a bit more money. We are conditioned to want to be rich (when we know the rich aren’t happy either); we are trained to want the latest gadget or style that television tells us to want; we want to earn more money because then we’ll have the good life.

But none of that will bring us happiness.

No matter how much we earn, no matter how much we have in the bank, no matter how nice our clothing or cars or toys, none of it will make us happier. And the sad thing is that it could take us decades of pursuing wealth and luxury items before we realize this.So what will bring us happiness? Luckily, it’s three things that don’t cost a thing. These three things have been proven by research — surveys of hundreds of thousands of people about what they have, what their lives are like, and how happy they are.Here they are, the Three Secrets to Happiness:

Good relationships. We have a human need to be close, to be intimate, with other human beings. Having good, supportive friendships, a strong marriage or close and loving relationships with our family members will make us much more likely to be happy. Action steps: Take time, today, to spend time with your loved ones, to tell them what they mean to you, to listen to them, and develop your relationship with them.
Positive thinking. I’m obviously a big proponent of positive thinking as the best way to achieve your goals, but it turns out that it can lead to happiness too. Optimism and self-esteem are some of the best indicators of people who lead happy lives. Happy people feel empowered, in control of their lives, and have a positive outlook on life. Action steps: Make positive thinking a habit. In fact, this should be one of the first habits you develop. Get into the habit of squashing all negative thoughts and replacing them with positive ones. Instead of “I can’t” think “I can”. It may sound corny, but it has worked for me, every time.
Flow. This is a popular concept on the Internet these days — the state we enter when we are completely focused on the work or task before us. We are so immersed in our task that we lose track of time. Having work and leisure that gets you in this state of flow will almost undoubtedly lead to happiness. People find greatest enjoyment not when they’re passively mindless, but when they’re absorbed in a mindful challenge. Action steps: Find work that you’re passionate about. Seriously — this is an extremely important step. Find hobbies that you’re passionate about. Turn off the TV — this is the opposite of flow — and get outside and do something that truly engages you.

You’ve been given the Three Secrets to Happiness. Don’t waste them!

7. How to feel calm & have peace of mind.....

2008-07-27T09:26:00.002-07:00

This fantastic quote summarizes something that I’ve been trying to focus on recently in my daily life:

“Whatever the tasks, do them slowlywith ease,in mindfulness,so not do any tasks with the goalof getting them over with.Resolve to each job in a relaxed way,with all your attention.”-

-Thich Nhat Hanh

In our daily lives, we often rush through tasks, trying to get them done, trying to finish as much as we can each day, speeding along in our cars to our next destination, rushing to do what we need to do there, and then leaving so that we can speed to our next destination.Unfortunately, it’s often not until we get to our final destination that we realize what madness this all is.At the end of the day, we’re often exhausted and stressed out from the grind and the chaos and the busy-ness of the day. We don’t have time for what’s important to us, for what we really want to be doing, for spending time with loved ones, for doing things we’re passionate about.And yet, it doesn’t have to be that way. It’s possible to live a simpler life, one where you enjoy each activity, where you are present in everything (or most things) you do, where you are content rather than rushing to finish things.If that appeals to you, let’s take a look at some suggestions for living a simple, peaceful, content life:

What’s important. First, take a step back and think about what’s important to you. What do you really want to be doing, who do you want to spend your time with, what do you want to accomplish with your work? Make a short list of 4-5 things for your life, 4-5 people you want to spend time with, 4-5 things you’d like to accomplish at work.
Examine your commitments. A big part of the problem is that our lives are way too full. We can’t possibly do everything we have committed to doing, and we certainly can’t enjoy it if we’re trying to do everything. Accept that you can’t do everything, know that you want to do what’s important to you, and try to eliminate the commitments that aren’t as important.
Do less each day. Don’t fill your day up with things to do. You will end up rushing to do them all. If you normally try (and fail) to do 7-10 things, do 3 important ones instead (with 3 more smaller items to do if you get those three done). This will give you time to do what you need to do, and not rush.
Leave space between tasks or appointments. Another mistake is trying to schedule things back-to-back. This leaves no cushion in case things take longer than we planned (which they always do), and it also gives us a feeling of being rushed and stressed throughout the day. Instead, leave a good-sized gap between your appointments or tasks, allowing you to focus more on each one, and have a transition time between them.
Eliminate as much as possible from your to-do list. You can’t do everything on your to-do list. Even if you could, more things will come up. As much as you can, simplify your to-do list down to the essentials. This allows you to rush less and focus more on what’s important.
Now, slow down and enjoy every task. This is the most important tip in this article. Read it twice. Whatever you’re doing, whether it’s a work task or taking a shower or brushing your teeth or cooking dinner or driving to work, slow down. Try to enjoy whatever you’re doing. Try to pay attention, instead of thinking about other things. Be in the moment. This isn’t easy, as you will often forget. But find a way to remind yourself. Unless the task involves actual pain, there isn’t anything that can’t be enjoyable if you give it the proper attention.
Sprinkle little pleasures throughout your day. Knowing what your simple pleasures are, and putting a few of them in each day, can go a long way to making life more enjoyable. You can check out my post : 51 little pleasures to Brighten up Your Day.
Find inspirations. Learn from the best. You can check out my post : 2 Inspirations for Living in the Moment

Do tell me your comments about what you felt after reading this........

6. Kick Procrastination - Execute your To Do List

2008-07-27T09:26:00.001-07:00

Have you gotten good at organizing your tasks in a to-do list, but have trouble actually executing them? You’re not alone.Getting things on your to-do list actually done is difficult because it’s really a collection of habits that most people don’t think about. “I feel resistance when starting work on something.”First of all, it’s good to analyze your resistance, which is something we don’t do often. Why don’t you want to start on something? Identifying the problem can help lead to the solution.Having said that, there are a couple of suggestions that could help:

Tiny chunk. Tell yourself you only have to do 5 minutes of work on it. That small amount of work is less intimidating.
Just start. Once you get going, it’s much easier to keep going. So tell yourself that all you have to do is start. Just fire up your program, and do the first few actions (i.e. start typing). It gets easier after that point.
Reward yourself. Don’t let yourself check email (or whatever reward works for you — something that you need to do every day) until you do at least 10 minutes (or 15 or 20, it doesn’t matter) on the task. Set a timer. Once your 10 minutes is up, set another timer for 5 minutes and do email. Then repeat.
Get excited about it. This is actually a tip that helps with any of these points. If you are excited about doing something, you will not hesitate to do it. For example, I love writing articles, and I was excited about writing it. As soon as I had the chance, I sat down to write it and only took one break. But how do you get excited about a task? Try to find something exciting about it. Will it bring you revenue? What can you do with that revenue? Will it bring you new clients, new opportunities, new recognition? If you can’t find anything exciting about a task, consider whether it’s really important or not — and if not, find a way to not do it. Sometimes eliminating (or delegating or delaying) the task is the best option.

“I am terrified of certain tasks, or of working on certain projects.”There are usually a few reasons those tasks or projects terrify you:

They are too intimidating in size or scope. To combat this, break it down into tinier chunks — actually, just the first tiny chunk. It’s intimidating to do a task like “Create report on X” or “Make a yearly plan for Z”. But if you just need to do the first physical action, which might be, “Call Frank for figures on X” or “Make a list of 10 things we should accomplish this year”, it’s much easier to tackle and less intimidating.
You don’t really know how to do it. If you haven’t done something a million times before, it is unfamiliar and unknown to you. And we are all terrified of that. The solution? First, get more information — learn as much as you can about it. That might require some research on the Internet, or talking to someone who’s done it before, or reading a book, or taking a class. Whatever you need to do, make the unknown become the known. Second, practice it as much as possible. Once you’ve learned how to do something, you need to practice it to become good at it. Don’t practice the whole thing — practice individual skills required to do a task or project, one at a time, until you’re good at those skills. Once you’ve mastered them, it will no longer be terrifying.
You are focusing on negative aspects. You might be focusing on how hard something is, or on all the obstacles. Try looking at the positive aspects instead. Focus on what a great opportunity this project represents … an opportunity to learn, to get better at something, to make more money, to work on a relationship, to gain some long-term recognition, to improve your advancement opportunities. If you look at the opportunities, not the problems, you will be less terrified and more likely to want to do it.

“I start, but I get distracted and never finish.”If you start, you’ve already made a big step towards finishing. Now you just need to work on the distractions.

Small tasks. I mentioned this above, but it’s really important to repeat here. If you are getting distracted, it may be because you are working too long on a single task or project. To remain focused, do only a small task — you are more likely to stay on task. If the task takes a long time, focus on only doing 15-20 minutes of it.
Single-task. Don’t allow yourself to do multiple tasks at the same time. Just do the one task before you. If you tend to do email, IM, surf the web, read your RSS feeds, talk on the phone and all of that while doing a task, you will inevitably be distracted from a task. Do one task at a time. If you feel yourself being pulled from the task, stop yourself. And bring yourself back.
Unplug. The biggest distractions come from connectivity. Email, IM, phones. Unplug from these connections while you’re working on your single task. This is always an unpopular suggestion, but before you reject it, give it a try. Turn everything off, and try to focus on one task. You’ll get a lot more done, I guarantee you. Right now, I’m writing this post while disconnected from the Internet. It’s much easier to concentrate.....lol
Clear your desk. Distractions can come from visual clutter. It can be worth it to clear everything off your desk. Also clear your walls and your computer desktop, and only work on one program at a time if possible.
Focus. Once your desk is clear and you unplug, and you’re working on that single task, really put all of your concentration on it. Pour your energies into that task, and see if you can get it done quickly. You might even get lost in it, and achieve that highly touted (deservedly so) state of mind known as “flow”.
Take breaks. It can help you to focus for a short amount of time on a single task, and use a time to help you focus, and then to take a break. This allows you to reboot your brain. Then, get back to work and focus on the next task.

“I often don’t feel like doing any work at all. The idea of work seems horrible and I never start doing anything.”I know this feeling well. It plagues us all, and there’s no one good answer. However, here are some suggestions:

Groom yourself. If you work from home, take a shower. Often the act of grooming ourselves can make us feel much better.
Take a walk. I find that a little walk can get my blood pumping, refresh my mind, and allow me to think about what I really want to do today. It might not be what you need, but it’s worth a shot.
Again, think of opportunities. Think about tomorrow — not tomorrow as in the distant future, but tomorrow as in the day after today. Imagine yourself looking back on today from tomorrow. Will you be glad you laid around? Or would you be happier if you did something, and took advantage of the opportunities in front of you today? It’s useful to think in terms of your future self — because what we do today will open up opportunities and new roads for tomorrow’s us.
Baby steps. Don’t think in terms of having to tackle an entire work day, or an entire list of stuff to do. That’s overwhelming. Just think of doing one thing. That’s all you have to do — just that one thing. Make it something small and easy, and ideally something fun and rewarding. Focus on that easy task. Once you get started, you might be more willing to do another thing. Then another.
Find fun stuff to do. If you just have boring or unpleasant things to do, you won’t feel like doing them. Instead, change your path for today — see if you can find something that’s fun or exciting, but still moves you forward on a project or goal. That might be what you need to get you jump-started to do other stuff..
Commit thyself. If motivation is your problem, commit yourself to making some progress with a goal or project today, or every day this week — tell all your family and friends, write it in your blog, or subscribe to my feeds — they will be a great motivator for you. Then hold yourself accountable by reporting to others what you did today.
Rewards. Tell yourself that if you just do that first task, you’ll get a nice ice cream sundae. Or that you can buy a book, or DVD. Whatever your reward, use it to motivate yourself to just get started. Then let the rest flow from there.

“I make a list of things to do the next day.. and on that day, I wake up looking forward to a bad day, full of unpleasant tasks, I don’t feel like doing anything from the list.”Two things to say here:

Overload. The most probable reason is that you’re overloading yourself. People tend to pile too much on themselves for a single day, overestimating how much they can actually do. Get into the habit of choosing only three Most Important Tasks to do for the day, and do them early in the day (at least two of them before email). If you only have three things to do, it’s not overwhelming. You’ll probably have some smaller things to do later, but write those down under a “batch process” heading, and do those small things all at once near the end of the day.
Fun. The second thing is that you’re loading yourself up with unpleasant tasks. Who wants to face a day of that? Instead, put down tasks that you’ll look forward to doing. Create an exciting to-do list for tomorrow. If you really have nothing important to do that’s enjoyable, it’s possible you’re in the wrong job. Look instead for a job that you’ll actually enjoy. Yes, every job has unpleasant and difficult tasks, but they lead to something rewarding. They support something you get excited about. If you don’t have anything like that in your job, you need to take a closer look at your job — revamp it somehow, or look for another.

If you have your own methods of getting your to-do list done? Or If you have other problems? Discuss it in the comments :)

5. 11 Tips & Ways to motivate yourself

2008-07-27T09:20:00.000-07:00

Sometimes, it really happens that we are deep down in our worries. We feel as if there is no end to our problems. We feel as if we have fallen deep down in a well and our life can't get any worse....

GOOD NEWS !! If at that time we feel our life cant get any worse, and we are at the deepest point in a well, Then there is only one way - and that one is TO RISE UP. If our life cant get any worse, that means we are going to bounce back, we are going to feel good again and enjoy life.....Yeah

At that time, we need motivation to bounce back.....here is how we can do it...

1. One Goal. Whenever I’ve been in a slump, I’ve discovered that it’s often because I have too much going on in my life. I’m trying to do too much. And it saps my energy and motivation. It’s probably the most common mistake that people make: they try to take on too much, try to accomplish too many goals at once. You cannot maintain energy and focus (the two most important things in accomplishing a goal) if you are trying to do two or more goals at once. It’s not possible — I’ve tried it many times. You have to choose one goal, for now, and focus on it completely. I know, that’s hard. Still, I speak from experience. You can always do your other goals when you’ve accomplished your One Goal.

2. Find inspiration and get excited. Inspiration, for me, comes from others who have achieved what I want to achieve, or who are currently doing it. I read other blogs, books, magazines. I Google my goal, and read success stories.

3. Post your goal. Print out your goal in big words. Make your goal just a few words long, like a mantra and post it up on your wall or refrigerator. Post it at home and work. Put it on your computer desktop. You want to have big reminders about your goal, to keep your focus and keep your excitement going. A picture of your goal (like a person having Mercedes car, for example) also helps.

4. Commit publicly. None of us likes to look bad in front of others. We will go the extra mile to do something we’ve said publicly. you can do it on your blog if you have one. And hold yourself accountable — don’t just commit once, but commit to giving progress updates to everyone every week or so.

5. Get support. It’s hard to accomplish something alone. Find your support network, either in the real world or online, or both.

6. Realize that there is a rise and a fall. Motivation is not a constant thing that is always there for you. It comes and goes, and comes and goes again, like the tide. But realize that while it may go away, it doesn’t do so permanently. It will come back. Just stick it out and wait for that motivation to come back. In the meantime, read about your goal , ask for help , and do some of the other things listed here until your motivation comes back.

7. Stick with it. Whatever you do, don’t give up. Even if you aren’t feeling any motivation today, or this week, don’t give up. Again, that motivation will come back. Think of your goal as a long journey, and your slump is just a little bump in the road. You can’t give up with every little bump. Stay with it for the long term, ride out the ebbs and surf on the flows, and you’ll get there.

8. Start small. Really small. If you are having a hard time getting started, it may be because you’re thinking too big. Want to wake up early? Don’t think about waking at 5 a.m. Instead, think about waking 10 minutes earlier for a week. That’s all. Once you’ve done that, wake 10 minutes earlier than that. Baby steps.

9. Read about it Daily. When I lose motivation, I just read a book or blog about my goal. It inspires me and reinvigorates me. For some reason, reading helps motivate and focus you on whatever you’re reading about. So read about your goal every day, if you can, especially when you’re not feeling motivated.

10. Think about the Benefits, not the difficulties. One common problem is that we think about how hard something is. Working 12 hours in office sounds so hard! Just thinking about it makes you tired. But instead of thinking about how hard something is, think about what you will get out of it. For example, instead of thinking about how tiring working long hours in office can be, focus on how good you’ll feel when you’ll get your salary slip, and what great gifts you can buy from that money.

11. Squash negative thoughts; replace them with positive ones. Along those lines, it’s important to start monitoring your thoughts. Recognize negative self-talk, which is really what’s causing your slump. Just spend a few days becoming aware of every negative thought. Then, after a few days, try squashing those negative thoughts like a bug, and then replacing them with a corresponding positive thought. Squash, “This is too hard!” and replace it with, “I can do this!

I hope it helps :-)

4. Thinking Positive

2008-07-27T09:18:00.000-07:00

We get to see there are so many books about positivity, motivation, success, not just books, there are so many articles on internet regarding the same..... Thats not enough - You will find so many people around you saying - BE POSITIVE even when they know you are in a bad situation.... Blah, What the hell ?
Why does it happen ???The point is that why do we need to be positive.......mmmmm, I pondered over it and have found an analogy to explain why we need to do so.. :)

A beautiful, soft leather couch, having a very deep seat with cozy cushions for those afternoon naps or sleepovers. Ah, just looking at it would make you feel good..... Yeah, thats a great place to lie down and relaaaaxxx....

What if it is allowed to be kept like that for some time, say a few days....... What would happen ?It would still be soft and comfy, but it would accumulate dust over itself....Would you like to sit on it now, without first removing the dust ????

Of course not... he he he

You would want to clean it every now and then so that it always look beautiful..... so that you always wanna make use of it, by feeling comfy sitting on it. So that when you see it, you say - WOW !!!! What a beautiful couch......Even our mind is like that - like a beautiful couch !!!!!
If we just allow it to remain like that, if we do not give it positive thoughts, dust of negativity will accumulate over it, and the once beautiful mind will now start looking dull....But you want your mind to remain beautiful always ....
Its simple, just spray a few fresh drops of positivity and it will get cleaned.....

That is why, we need to clean our mind so that it always remains beautiful.... just like the fresh and crystal clear drops of dew on grass during mornings !!!!

3. Planning your week

2008-07-27T09:06:00.000-07:00

If your week is seven buckets, and you go into each bucket without planning ahead, and you fill it up with little pebbles and grains of sand and whatever other debris comes your way … soon there will be no room for the Big Rocks. Your buckets fill up faster than you know it, and once your buckets are full, you’re done. You can’t get bigger buckets.

What you can do is put the Big Rocks in first, and fill in the pebbles and sand around them.

The Big Rocks are the major things you want to get done this week. A report, launching a new website, going to the gym, spending time with your spouse and kids, achieving your dreams. These Big Rocks get pushed back from week to week because we never have time to do them — our days fill up too quickly, and before we know it, weeks have passed and the Big Rocks are still sitting on the side, untouched.

Plan your week ahead of time, placing your Big Rocks first
Here’s how you do it (with the unavoidable list, of course!):

Make a list. At the beginning of the week — Sunday evening or Monday morning — write out the Big Rocks that you want to accomplish this week. These should be the important things — if you looked back on the week and said you did them, you would be proud of having done them. Be sure to include not only work stuff, but some of the tasks that will further along your life’s goals and dreams.
Keep it short. In the beginning, just have 4-6 … you don’t need to try to do 10 or more Big Rocks, especially not at first. Later, you may get better at judging how many Big Rocks you can do in a week, but for now, shoot for about one per day.
Place the Rocks. Look at your weekly schedule. If you don’t have one, write out the days of the week with one-hour blocks (or print out a schedule from an online calendar). Write out pre-existing appointments. Now take your Big Rocks, and put them in the schedule. Try to put them in a spot where you know you’ll get them done. Not a spot that’s traditionally too busy to concentrate, and not in a little half-hour window between meetings. Give yourself time to do it.
Leave space for the incoming pebbles. Don’t fill in the rest of the schedule if possible. Every morning, look at your schedule and commit yourself to doing the Big Rock(s) for that day. That’s your MIT ( Most Important Task ) for the day. If there are less important MITs, you can put them in the schedule, but don’t put too much. A tight schedule tends to bump into itself, pushing things back when other things inevitably take too long.
Do it early. If you can, place your Big Rocks first thing in the morning. Don’t schedule them for later in the day if possible, because by that time, a few fires have come up, and the Big Rock will get pushed back as always. Do it first, and then you’ve got the rest of the day for the busy-work.
Be Proud. When your week’s done, look back on it — if you got any (or all!) of the Big Rocks done, be proud of yourself and happy. It feels good!

How does this simple method make you more productive? Well, productivity isn’t about doing a lot of stuff.
It’s about getting the important stuff done.
But if you’re running around doing all the little stuff … sure, you did a lot and you were very busy, but how much did you really accomplish? Oftentimes we can look back on our week and say, “I didn’t get a lot done, but I sure was stressed doing it!”This is a way of getting the important stuff done. Sure, you’ll still have to worry about the little stuff. But at the end of the week, you can look back and say that you’ve been productive.
It makes a world of difference.

2. Set a Most Important Task for today

2008-07-27T09:05:00.001-07:00

If you use this concept on a daily basis, it can help you out tremendously. It’s very simple: your MIT is the task you most want or need to get done today.You can set up maximum to three MITs — the three things you must accomplish today. Depends upon you, but try setting not more than 3 MIT's.The idea is that no matter what else you do today, these are the things You want to be sure of doing. So, the MIT is the first thing you do each day.

And here’s the key to the MITs : at least one of the MITs should be related to one of your goals.
While the other two can be work stuff or anything else you feel, one must be a goal next-action. This ensures that you are doing something to move your goals forward that day.And that makes all the difference in the world. Each day, you will be doing something to make your dreams come true.

Another key: do your MITs first thing in the morning, either at home or when you first get to work. If you put them off to later, you will get busy and run out of time to do them. Get them out of the way, and the rest of the day is gravy!It’s such a small thing to implement, and yet I’m raving about it like it’s a huge revelation. But it is. Sometimes small things can make big differences. I highly recommend you give it a go.

Note : MIT is not my invention. I found the concept of MIT at an article which I read at http://lifehacker.com/software/top/geek-to-live--control-your-workday-187074.php

1. What is Fear ?? - False Evidence Appearing Real

2008-07-27T08:58:00.000-07:00

FEAR.....Its one of the worst problems humans are facing since centuries.....It makes people do weird things. It makes people feel insecure, uncertain and anxious, it can even destroy relationships.We know so many people who would say - I fear this, I fear that....
But have you ever wondered if fear is fearful of anything ?

'Fear' is afraid of FAITH. Yeah, That's the key to tackle fear.

Where there is faith, there is no fear.

- In cricket, If a batsman has faith in himself that he will make a century, will he fear the bowler?
At least he will give it a try..... How else do you think Sachin Tendulkar has made the highest record for centuries in Test as well as one day cricket?Even the most fearsome of bowlers say - "Sachin knows no fear"

- If a painter has faith in himself that he will create a masterpiece, will he fear the canvas?
MF Hussain (India) is more than 91 years old, very recently he sold a painting of 7.5 Lakh US Dollars. Do you think he fears his age, I bet he doesnt.

Faith has great powers in it. Faith can move mountains. Fight fear by having faith.If you have faith in yourself that everything is going to turn out good for you and that you are going to achieve your goals, If you have built enough faith, then even if any obstacle comes in your path, you will be able to conquer it.

There is a bible verse whose English translation says:
If you have faith, everything shall be possible to you.
Its just a matter of having faith, having belief in yourself. Whatever fear you have, just remove it by filling your mind with thoughts of FAITH.

1. If you have fear of rejection - Say to yourself that your opinion matters to you more than the opinion of others. or if u have a few close friends, say to yourself that opinion of your close friends matter to you more than opinion of others. That will help you gain some confidence.You are a unique historic event in yourself. There is no one on the whole planet quite like you and they can never be, even if they try.No one can be you as efficiently as you can be !!

2. If you have fear of failure - Imagine yourself as succeeding. Try doing it repeatedly. Tell yourself that you will always succeed no matter what, and if you do that repeatedly, all your fears will vanish away.Even after then, if you fail, then remember -

Failures are the pillars of success.

- Do you think Thomas Edison succeeded the first time itself when he was creating the bulb?He had to undergo many failures to achieve big victory

Always give yourself thoughts of positivity and faith. Ok, Lets try this out.
Right now, with me - Read the next 4 lines loudly, no matter where you are sitting. They can bring a beautiful change in your life. Yes I mean it - Say them loudly and you will see the difference. :)

I believe in myself. I have faith in me.
I have faith in me that I can achieve all my goals.
I have faith that my life is becoming beautiful with each passing day.
This moment is the first moment of the rest of my life !!

Don't forget to tell me in your comments - Howwaaazzzaattt !!

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